Fondling the Clitoris of the Goddess

I've read a few years back that people love the only way they know how. And as I look into what has happened in my life as to how I love, this proves to be real. The first time, I was very scared of love, fearing rejection, being possessive and controlling. I would be so controlling even as to manipulate, lie and cheat to get what I wanted, which is basically, the girl I loved. But now I realize that that is not how love should be. There can never be love unless one is free to love and open to love- a mutuality of giving and receiving. Note: receiving, not taking. What's the difference? Recieving has the consent of the giver, while taking comes in many forms: emotional blackmail, emotional or physical abuse, isolation and many others. In these situation when you take, you rip the soul of the one you love and her growth is stunted by the growing dependence on you. Taking therefore is a form of rape. This is sick. How could you love a person who cannot be herself when she's with you? She would be a zombie child with a muted voice and a torn soul. It is said: "Love is the child of Liberty." In love, one should be free.

The next few times I thought I was in love was triggered by the feeling of being happiest. Now I must say that if two people are in love with each other, they are sure to be happiest with eachother. Right? Well yes, perhaps this would be true, for some time. But happiness fades and what sets in is the cold chains of commitment and indifference. You see, happiness is actually in the moment. It comes from what happens; HAPPINess, HAPPEN? hehe so what? Here's what. What if happiness a.k.a happiest is lost, how can one revive and revitalize the relationship? Here's how: find, in lieu of happiness, joy.

Joy is a perpetual sense of peace and conentment. This can only be attained, I believe, through spirituality and identification with God. In the Bible, this would be a gift of the Holy Spirit, and unless the Holy Spirit is within us, there could never be any real joy in our lives, evidenced by the lack of consistency in our loving our beloved. Because without this joy, we are just actually in a rollercoaster ride of happiest, happy, I don't know, miserable, empty, then back to happiest again. A cycle, which may work, but as I have experienced, there is a better way.

Now, as I take all this in, and evaluate my experiences, I have to say that nothing can create in me the joy that is needed in loving someone than to be able to receive the flow of love from God. Here's why: I believe that for one to see the beauty in others, one should first see the beauty and miracle of God. Second, He should then be able to see the beauty and the miracle of and in himself. Then, and finally, He should see the beauty and miacle of and in his beloved. See, love is the acknowledgement of the beauty and the miracle of the beloved. It is looking into her eyes and seeing the magnificence, miracle, and brillance of God through and within her. In this regard, it is identifying her with the Divine: seeing for yourself the divinity of your beloved. In essence, when you love someone, she is a Goddess.

How you would woo a Goddess is how you should treat the one you love. With reverence. With happiness and joy. With overwhelming desire merged with the same amount of compassion and caution. Because the Goddess doesn't let anyone fondle her clitoris. He should be worthy. He should be God.

Loving someone is seeing your equal, you partner, the yin to your yang. And in this balance, love is hope and faith is courage. Equality in love is the two angels in the Ark of the Covenant, in the Holy of Holies, gazing at each other in mutual and perpetual rapture.